A Little Efficiency, Please

Would someone hand that little pissant a cyanide capsule already? Or at least a nice fresh rope. James Holmes, the suspect in the Aurora, Colorado movie massacre, has made various “half-hearted” suicide attempts in recent days, law enforcement sources tell CBS4′s Brian Maass. Don’t make me come out there…

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Hero of the Day, Hotlanta Style

Pick on an old guy will you? Hello Darwin! DeKalb police spokesman J.T. Ware said that about 11 p.m., the unidentified suspect, who appeared to be in his 20s, broke into the home on Zemory Drive, in a neighborhood off Lawrenceville Highway.“The suspect, as he was entering the location, made enough noise to arouse the […]

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Heroes of the Day, Hooah!

Today’s heroes are a courtroom full of folks who weren’t really in the mood for a throat-slashin’: A female federal prosecutor was viciously attacked by a hulking, razor-wielding drug dealer in a Brooklyn courtroom yesterday – and was saved when the thug’s 72-year-old lawyer and others tackled him. Now that is what I’m talkin’ about! […]

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Habib’s Organ Hut

Fresh organs daily! Iranian students are offering rewards totaling a million dollars for the execution of three top Israeli military officers over the deadly strikes on Gaza, and they are encouraging fellow Iranians to donate their kidneys to raise the funds, the student news agency ISNA reported on Monday. Hey, fellas, I hear they’re paying […]

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Heroes of the Day, With Meatballs*

Ok, here’s something we’re not accustomed to hearing about from the land of Eurotrash (specifically Sweden), actual arse-kickery: “The robber came in, pulled out his gun and went up to the cash desk. Then he said: ‘Take it easy – this is a robbery’,” one witness told newspaper GT. There were chaotic scenes in the […]

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Wonder Twin Powers ACTIVATE*

Via Mad Rocket Scientist, comes this story of 17 year-old twin brothers who took the B&E of their house a bit personally: Clay, the older brother by six minutes, went upstairs to see whether his instruments had been stolen and found a man partially hidden behind a door frame leading to a rec room. The […]

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