Guess Which Parts Are Sarcasm

Ordinarily I would not bestir myself on this subject, since so many others devote far more time to it, but we are watching the progress of Florida SB 234 with great interest, since it will allow open carry for concealed weapon carriers here in the Sunshine State.

For the record, the only reason this interests me is since it is bloody hot down here most of the year, and wearing a jacket or long shirt over my usual t-shirt is simply not going to happen.  And since I’m a girl, wearing the typical shorter-tailed girlie type shirts, this means belt carry under my shirt is not possible.  Any sort of movement, even walking, will cause my holster to be visible, which will undoubtedly cause old ladies to keel over in fright.  Therefore I usually wind up carrying in my purse, which A) is extremely heavy and annoying, and B) is like not carrying a gun at all.  Passage of this bill means I can belt carry and not worry about being arrested when some Neanderthal deputy – which seems to be the only kind they’re hiring these days – sees a flash of holster on a sunny day.

Alas, my county’s sheriff – who on a good day has delusions of being the next Joe Arpaio – thinks this is all Very Bad:

A visible weapon could provoke crimes of opportunity, and concealed-weapon permit holders — unlike deputies — don’t have to pass physical fitness tests, said Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd.

In phone interviews, each sheriff said he supports the Second Amendment. Judd said he’s an advocate of the NRA.

“But at the end of the day, this is bad legislation and should not be passed,” he said.

They’re worried that deputies who respond to a conflict won’t know who to disarm if they see several people with guns.

I am quite pleased the top cop in my county is apparently a sniveling moron, who will not take responsibility for hiring adequately evolved individuals with enough native intelligence to disarm “several people with guns” long enough to check their IDs/permits.  I am also pleased there’s no intention of better training said Neanderthals to carry out the above simple operation sans pants-filling.  This seems like a spectacular usage of the property taxes I pay to this county every year.

Here’s a thought, Sheriff Judd:  If your homunculi deputies come across “several people with guns,” shoot the ones who turn the guns on your deputies.  Because if folk who have bothered to sit through the concealed carry class (as well as get fingerprinted and background checked, and pay the cash money required for the license) are stupid enough to actually point their pieces at a man with a badge, then we surely don’t need them in our rank and file and you are more than welcome to their cooling corpses.

Alternatively, man up and actually TRAIN your people to be more than mere shit-kickers.  Oh, and kindly check the stats in the OTHER FORTY THREE STATES that allow open carry to their CC holders.  Rube.

Updated to add anecdote: Yesterday the kids and I were grocery shopping.  My son – who is 13 – said, “Hey, did that open carry bill pass?”  I said, “Not yet, why?”  He said, “There’s a guy over there with a gun on his belt.”  I looked, man with a high and tight wearing nice dress pants and a dress shirt, gun holstered neatly on his belt.  I said, “Probably a cop.”  Son shrugged and said, “Hey, can we get some Cheerios?”

No hysteria, no pants-filling.  And unsurprisingly (at least to those of us with sense) none whatsoever from the rest of the grocery-shopping public as well.


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7 Responses to “Guess Which Parts Are Sarcasm”

  1. DesertPundit Says:
    March 17th, 2011

    Someone in civilian clothes with a holstered gun just walked into the store. Nothing happened. #AZ That is all.

  2. cmblake6 Says:
    March 17th, 2011

    NM is open carry unless you want to spend the money and time for a CCL. Nobody excretes bricks at the bank, the grocer, anywhere. OMG!!!!11ELEVENTY!!1!Dodge City! Blood In The Streets!! Nope, everyday life.

  3. Larry Says:
    March 17th, 2011

    I’m also hoping it passes because my daughter lives in Jacksonville.
    Here in NC they are working on a bill that would allow CC in parks and restaraunts that serve alcohol (as long as there is no alcohol being consumed by the bearer). I’m hoping it passes, too.

  4. JDiehl Says:
    April 4th, 2011

    Let’s see, mandatory class – which you have to pay for so you can exercise you 2nd amendment right…. See any similarity here to making blacks pay to vote? Golleee who would have ever thought of such a thing…. Talk about abridgement.

    George Soros aided the Nazis by divvying up their property – his comment – If I didn’t do it someone else would have. And he is walking around in our country doing his best to have guns removed via the valueless UN W H A T is going on here?

  5. Darthkeller Says:
    November 12th, 2012

    In Oklahoma we passed Concealed Carry in June. It went into effect on November 1, and for the first few days it was odd to see a gun.

    Now? Meh…

  6. madmike Says:
    November 12th, 2012

    Welcome Back!
    i am a former LEO (and now have a CHL) from a hot area and understand your concerns. there are a couple of workarounds for men, CCW pants, ankle holsters and fanny packs work but are obvious. (trust me, we always knew who the other LEOs were). mostly now i pocket carry

    you might want to check out the “flashbang” holster @ i think it might be a good idea for a female CHL holder in hot areas. they haven’t made one for my wife’s pistol yet but when they do she plans on buying one.

  7. Wyoh Says:
    November 12th, 2012

    Madre de dios. Want to torture me? Make me wear 24oz of metal between my *ahem* self and my unmentionables. *shudder*


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